Did you know that Car Talk has over 600 staff on its payroll? Neither did Tom and Ray! Clearly a staffing review is in order.
My Favorites
1. Jamaican Document Security Expert: Euripedes Upmann
2. Bungee Jumping Instructor: Hugo First
3. Used Car Salesman: Alexis Itznot
4. Fact Checker, Mexico City Office: C.S. Verdad
Trusty Garage Employees
Director of Guaranteed Repeat Business: Lucinda Boltz
Brake Adjuster: Schlomo Quigley
Romanian Emissions Tester: Vlad the Inhaler
Bolt Tightener: Tilda Plierslip
Chairman, Federal Lubrication Board: Alan Greasepan
From the Car Talk Financial Division
Repair Cost Consultant: Bill M. Moore
Chief Accountant: Candace B. Rittenoff
Credit Counselor: Max Stout
Customer Credit Officer: Noah Wayne Hellman
Director of Accounts Payable: Bill Shredder
401 K Advisor: Hugh Don Wannano
Grunt Workers
Russian Intern: Igor Beaver
Staff Intern: Lois Rung
Double Duty
Gastroenterologist: Cameron Diaz
Manager, Donkey Based Video Equipment: Cameron Diaz
From the Tokyo Office
Libel Defense Director in Tokyo: Sosumi Areti
Personal Hygiene Advisor from the Tokyo Office: Oh Takashawa
Former Politicians
Secretary of Halogen Headlamps: Made-A-Lane Allbright
Staff Temporary Housing Specialist: Condo Leaser Rice
Surgeon General: C. Everett Koop DeVille
Timing Director: Benjamin Not-Yet-You-Yahoo!
Chief of Tire Technology: Yessir Itsaflat
Department of Getting Away With It on NPR
Self Defense Instructor: Nina Cahones
Staff Groper: Manny Bumsfeldt
Transgender Studies Expert: Ben Her
Employees of the Month
Director of Employee Loyalty Program: Upton Leftus
Ornithologist in Training: Luke A. Boyd
Poet Laureate: Robert Defrost
Puzzler Tester: Otis S. Hard
Staff Meteorologist from the Seattle Office: Wayne Goaway
Staff Alpinist: Arianna Topyet
Airline Reservation Manager: Will Price Randomly
Safari Planner: Sarah Anne Getty
Chairman, Underemployment Study Group: Art Majors
Assistant Director of Moral Support: Hugo Gurll
Director of Firestone Tire Recalls: Ivana Michelin
Defense Dept. Consultant: Major Error
Director of Global Warming: Nomar Winter
Head of Security: Barb Dwyer
Emergency Preparedness Director: Ron Lykell
Listen to Car Talk on KUOW 94.9FM from 9 to 10 AM on Saturdays, or via Podcast. And check out the Personnel Department to find your favorite workers!
The Tappet Brothers are also having a look alike contest, but I hope nobody reading this thinks they should enter!
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Now playing: Jakalope - Go Away
via FoxyTunes
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